1. 酔った私『一番好きだった人と結婚したかった、人生間違えた』夫「え?」私『あっ、』 → 後日、夫「…」私『ど、どうしたのよおお!!(泣』 → なんと・・・
  2. 産婦人科を受診すると妊娠が発覚。私「(何で?時期的に誰とも関係を持ってないのに・・)」 → 会社に帰宅すると、上司『できてた?(ニヤ』私「え?」 → 驚愕の真実が・・・
  3. 同僚『離婚したい。俺は所詮ATM扱いだ』嫁「離婚したくない(号泣」娘「お父さんを臭いなんて言ってごめんなさい(土下座」 → 離婚した数年後、同僚『』俺「!?」なんと・・・
  4. 嫁のウワキが発覚。俺『間男は?』嫁「あなたの先輩」『え』 → メールと録音した音声を聞くと・・俺『おk』 → 後日、先輩の49日法要が終わった。ざまぁ。嫁「ごめんね(泣」
  5. 俺『今日は結婚記念日だね』幼馴染の嫁「元カレとウワキしてる。ってか本気」俺『え?』間男「慰謝料の400万です」 → その後、実家「毎年手紙が届いてるよ」 → ざまぁwww
  6. 元嫁の希望で離婚。数年後、親「あんたの元嫁から電話があったよ」俺『え?なんで?』「連絡してほしいって。でも一度興信所で調べてみる」 → 興信所「…」俺『ファッ!?』
  7. 突然婚約者の事がムリになった。私『結婚できない。別れましょ』彼「え?」『サヨウナラ』そのまま友人のいる海外へ → 帰国すると、同僚「お前を俺達は一生許さない」なんと・・・
  8. 私をイジメてた連中から同窓会の案内がきたので、『娘はタヒにました。「本人もその家族も許さない。みんながタヒぬまで呪い続ける」と言っていました』と書いて返信した結果wwww
  1. 俺「愛しているよ」嫁「私も愛している」 その晩の嫁のスマホには間男に向けて「旦那が愛してるとか言ってきてキモい」  → あーあ、嫁は最後のチャンスを自ら不意にしてしまいました
  2. 俺「俺とは違ってモテるからうらやましいよw」モテモテの女「でも、本当に好きな人は私の事を恋愛対象として見てくれないんです」
  3. 両親が急逝。進学を諦めて就職し、なんとか弟2人を大学に入れた。しかし結婚を控えた上の弟が「高卒の兄がいるのは恥ずかしいので秘密にしたい」 → この事が相手の両親にバレた結果…
  4. 彼女の双子の妹が妊娠した。俺「へぇ 妹ちゃん彼氏いたんだ。俺の知ってる人?」妹「…父親は(俺)さんです」俺「!?」 → 衝撃の真実が明らかになった
  5. 彼氏と3年間の遠距離恋愛中だった。友人「ねぇ…彼氏さんから結婚式の招待状が届いたよ…?」私「え!?」 → 彼氏実家に聞いて判明した真相は、なんと…
  1. 元嫁と別れる間際に「家族養う気力も無いのに結婚とか結局それに伴う器が無かったんだよw」 と笑いながら罵られた → しかし俺が再婚後、蓄えがあると聞きつけた元嫁は…
  2. 結婚式のお色直しで控え室に下がったきり新婦が姿を消した。スタッフ「ザワザワ」救急車「ピーポーピーポー」新婦は変わり果てた姿で・・ → 遺言書『』なんと・・・
  3. A子は学校一の美人、B男は医者のイケメン息子。対して私のあだ名は『ブタ子』。中学時代はやつらによくいじめられた→現在、因果は巡る。
  1. フリン女「旧帝卒年収一千万資産なしより、 日大卒で品川区に一戸建て持ちの方が上だよな」
  1. 大学時代から5年つきあった婚約者に式直前で浮気された。相手は後輩。学生時代から隠れて婚約者にアプローチをし続けていたらしい。 → そして10年後の現在は…
  1. 突然同僚がおかしくなった。上司に「(上司)さんってホントハゲですよね〜」女性には「胸が無いとモテないですよねw」→強制的に退職。それから一年後…Aさんは亡くなった
   

【くっそw】陣痛中私「2階建てのマクドナルドの1階にあるカウンター席、何て言うか知ってる? 」

418: 名無しの心子知らず 2013/04/17(水) 22:19:48.00 ID:sCldjITH

昨年の夏、トータル59時間で出産。

三日間ほとんど寝ておらず、陣痛と陣痛の合間にガクっと意識が無くなり
痛みで意識が戻った時
「2階建てのマクドナルドの1階にあるカウンター席、何て言うか知ってる?
業界用語で“ヤッツケ”って言うんだよ」と、旦那に言っていたらしい。
もちろん後日その話になった時、ナニソレ!?(・_・;?状態。


因みに、いきみ逃しには団扇が最強だった。陣痛の波がきたら、
キタキタキタキター!ふううぅぅぅぅぅぅっぅっぅ!!!
と自分ではなく、天井をこまかく扇ぐ事でいきまず済んだ。

 




419: 名無しの心子知らず 2013/04/17(水) 22:19:49.00 ID:VYUOGceD
>>418
ワロタwww
元クルーさん?

 

420: 名無しの心子知らず 2013/04/17(水) 22:19:50.00 ID:1/aIWCNu
豆知識陣痛ワロタww

 

421: 名無しの心子知らず 2013/04/17(水) 22:19:51.00 ID:6bvo7c2l
おつです
やっつけ仕事しか思いつかなかった

 

422: 418 2013/04/17(水) 22:19:52.00 ID:gm7i0jLR
もちろん架空の豆知識です!

 

423: 名無しの心子知らず 2013/04/17(水) 22:19:53.00 ID:gdqNbjpT
>>422
しかも架空www

 

424: 名無しの心子知らず 2013/04/17(水) 22:19:54.00 ID:sgZ4ZC/v
>>422
新手の詐欺かとwww

 

425: 名無しの心子知らず 2013/04/17(水) 22:19:55.00 ID:EeNT1Jyu
>>422
ちょwww
思いっきり信じてたわwww

 

426: sage 2013/04/17(水) 22:19:56.00 ID:RHT/PJez
>>422
新たなる女神登場w
豆知識詐欺ww

 

427: 名無しの心子知らず 2013/04/17(水) 22:19:57.00 ID:JDa/qqzT
>>422
マックで働いたことあるけど知らなかったなー、最近の用語なのかしら?と思ってたのにw
架空豆知識女神面白すぎ

 

430: 名無しの心子知らず 2013/04/17(水) 22:20:00.00 ID:+LqDTN9Y
>>422
面白すぎるwww

 

428: 418 422 2013/04/17(水) 22:19:58.00 ID:dLa4j/TE
旦那からその話を聞くまでは、冷静で理想的なお産だったと思ってたのに
一気に怪しくなり、これは助産師さんにも豆知識詐欺を働いた可能性大。

 

429: 名無しの心子知らず 2013/04/17(水) 22:19:59.00 ID:x0BPHmTt
>>428
www

 

431: 名無しの心子知らず 2013/04/17(水) 22:20:01.00 ID:JDxeyLYJ

>>428

> もちろん架空の豆知識です! (キリッ

www
オナカイタイww

もっと旦那さんとかに聞いてみて欲しい~

 

引用元:https://www.logsoku.com/



  1. 祖母の葬式で。祖父「棺の中に入れてあげる物を用意して」警察「署に行きましょうか」参加者A「え?」 → 数時間後、また警察がやって来て・・「さらに2人逮捕する」衝撃だった
  2. 夫が娘の髪を掴んでコンロで焼いてた。私「離婚!」裁判所で夫『俺は家族の為に尽くしてきた(号泣』弁護士「これはヤバイ。調停員が夫に同情してる」 → 私「では・・」夫『え?』
  3. 嫁と間男が合体してた。警察「夫さんを書類送検する」間男「俺をなぐったから慰謝料も取る」嫁「財産もねw」会社「夫さんクビ」夫「なら・・・」 → トンデモナイ事に
  4. 居酒屋で予約客が当日に「あの、今日の予約はキャンセルしたいんですけど…」俺「あ、はい」 → キャンセル料も払ってるし問題ないんだけど、その理由が衝撃的すぎた
  5. バイト先の地味な女の子『家出して男の所に住み込んでいる』私(意外だ・・) → 数ヶ月後、バイト先に警察「私さんはいますか?」私「はい、」(何で名指し?) → 驚愕だった
  6. 友人A『お前の嫁妊娠させてやったw』俺「本当か?」嫁「ごめんなさい(泣」友人A(ニヤニヤ) → 俺「ありがとな、マジで。お前に感謝するわ」友人A『え?』 → なんと・・・
  7. 俺は年収600万円。離婚調停で嫁が養育費40万円と要求してきたので、こっちは0円で回答した結果…
  8. 子供を連れた警察「この子があなたの住所と名前を言って探してくれって」私『え?知らない子です。名前は?』子供「…」私『やっぱり知らない!』 → しかし、驚愕の真実・・・
  9. A子が先輩に襲われ、裏ビ★オとして流出。A子「日本に居られない。海外に行く」数年後、先輩の結婚式で・・ → 経営者「警察に!(真っ青」新婦「だめぇえ!」俺「あははw(泣」
  10. 東京の大学で急に周りからヒソヒソされるようになった。私『何かしたかな、』教授「その子達と何の話をした?」私『地元の話をした』 → 教授「それはダメだ!」衝 撃 だ っ た
  1. 友「あんたの彼氏結婚するの?」私「え!?誰と??」→3年間2股進行で捨てられた私→怒った地元の友人たちは結婚式をボイコット→その結果wwwwwww
  2. 妹は畜生だ。奴は私の婚約者を奪い、腹を蹴って私を流★させた→親「あんた姉だし、不倫で追い出された妹の面倒みろ」→私に子連れで寄生しようとしたので夜逃げした結果…
  3. トラックに轢かれそうになった女の子を身を挺して助け、代わりに轢かれた俺には後遺症が残ることに... しかし後日、俺の病室に女の子の母親が怒鳴り込んできた → なんと母親は・・・
  1. タヒんだ弟の嫁と結婚した結果は…
  2. 美人嫁「悩んだのですが、離婚してください」 俺「理由は?」 嫁「ただあなたに対する愛情が無くなってきました」 俺「じゃあぐに出て行って」 嫁...
  3. 嫁「もう離婚しましょう」俺「…わかった」嫁「念のため調停調書を作りたいから調停離婚ね」俺「…わかった」嫁「養育費は2-4万かな」俺「…わかった」 → いざ申立書が来たら『養育費22万』!嫁に入れ知恵したのは誰だ!
  1. ママ友「奥さん、男の人とホテルに入っていったよ…」俺「!?」そして調査の結果は真っ黒だったが、結局再構築。 しかし嫁は、なんと… → 決着つけて半年、嫁から届いたメールの中身は…
  2. 息子は自閉症だったのでお世話係として10歳下の娘を作ったが、せっかく作った娘も軽度の発達障害の自閉症だった。その娘は25歳になったが兄の面倒を見ずに就職している。障害者なんだから健常者である両親の言う事を聞くべきなのに
  3. 主人が出張しているとき年下の彼のところに泊まっていたら、いきなり主人と弁護士他の訪問を受け、その場で離婚を告げられました。彼にもその場で捨てられ、何もかも失いました…
  4. 嫁の事故が原因でオレは腕を失くした。嫁『腕ないとかムリ離婚!』嫁親「じゃあお前勘当だ!」嫁『(仕方ない…)』 → 数年後、嫁『カレーできたよ』オレ「えっ」 → なんと…
  5. jk「この人、痴カンです!」イケメン「俺?違うよ」駅員「本当ですか?」俺「冤罪ですよ。俺、見てましたから」→ すると、イケメン「・・・」→ 衝撃のオチ…
  6. 夫「全部(ウワキ)知っている。これからどうしたい?」私『離婚してほしい』夫「泣」 → 間男と再婚したある日、変わりはてた元夫と再会してしまい…
  1. 嫁が妊娠!?喜ぶ俺を地の底に叩き落した嫁の言葉は、「あんたの子じゃないから勘違いしないで。育てさせてあげるけど、父親ヅラはしないでね?」 衝撃の事実は他にもあって…
  2. 兄は結婚した時に家を出て行った→それから10年経ち、娘が小学生に上がるタイミングで実家に戻ることにしたらしい。兄『35歳独身のキモオタ弟(俺)は娘に悪影響しかないし嫁も嫌がるので家から出ていってほしい 』俺「え???」
  3. 姉が命がけで子を出産 → 母「(この子えらく色素が薄いな…障害かな…)」 → どんどん日本人の見た目から離れていき…姉旦那『DNA鑑定します』 → 結果…
  1. 主婦「トルコリラで1200万円失いました、買ってからただの一度もプラスになったことはありませんでした」
  • 妻「彼を愛しています離婚してください」→後日連れてきた男はイケメンの御曹司。相手には慰謝料など痛くもなく、親権も取られた。俺は全てを失ったはずだったが事態は急変する
    1. ちょっとしたきっかけで嫁のW不倫に気が付いた、俺はもう再構築不可能と思い離婚届を出し余分な荷物を処分して引越した・・・浮気の事で問つめる事も考えたが 言わなかった
    2. 社内の美人をデートに誘った。 当日… 地味女「こんにちわ」俺「!?」 → 人間違えだったと言えないまま、その3年後…
    3. 嫁が嫁上司と浮気。しかし嫁上司「夫婦関係は破綻してたんでしょ?慰謝料なんか払わない」俺「!?」 → 相手が一番ダメージを受ける復讐をした結果は…
    4. 嫁の不倫。相手はエリート上司で気付いた時には手遅れ。戦争だった。すさまじい戦力差の中で少ない手持ちで先に証拠を押さた。勝利条件は美人間嫁の強奪
    5. 届いた妻のハ●●リ写真、その表情は快楽中毒。提供者の意図は制裁の依頼。そして真実は妻の日記に
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    1. 結婚前提にお付き合いしていた彼女に3回も衝撃を受けた。
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    1. 名無し より:

      > もちろん架空の豆知識です!

      俺のルイボスティー返せwww

      0

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